FOREVER & A DAY

2011-01-16T05:46:00.000-08:00

THIS IS WHERE I CAN ESCAPE REALITY

Why?

Till today..

I often wonder, I look at people, I read from others, I always wonder, why can't we be like them? Why is it so hard to be just genuinely in love? Why is it so hard?

Drowning. One word says it all.

Sometimes, I wish you would understand. Just listen and understand. Can we be in love again? Is this it?

2010-12-13T17:53:00.000-08:00

Is LOVE enough to bring us back?

I miss you.....

Please don't judge me...

I want to go home, but is there still a home?

Where to we go?

U still have the key to my heart

2010-09-27T03:37:00.000-07:00

DON'T FUCKING GET IT WHY PEOPLE CAN DO SUCH IMMORAL THINGS

WHERE IS YOUR FUCKING HEAD, YOU DICKHEAD!

seriously!

2010-09-26T03:58:00.000-07:00

I WISH UPON THE STARS

Why do it hurts so much? Why the tears?

How I wish you would know how I feel at times, and how is it like to be in shoes

It is scary, how I mean so much to you one day, and nothing the next. It is as though the days leading up to this does not mean anything.

Will you do that for me?

How do we know is too soon or too long?

But u have up

Probably...

2010-09-10T01:18:00.000-07:00

I LL TELL YOU WHAT I FEEL

2010-09-06T06:06:00.000-07:00

2010-09-06T05:43:00.000-07:00

HOW MUCH MORE LIES

Can't differentiate anymore. What is the truth and what not. My biggest flaw, insecurity.

Maybe, maybe I am just not enough,

2010-08-18T01:06:00.001-07:00

DO YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS

2010-08-17T20:33:00.000-07:00

FOR EVERYTHING THAT IS NICE,....

Still feeling lost, still feel like it still just don't belong. Want to feel love again. Want to love again.

Please make it go away

2010-08-12T13:59:00.000-07:00

WORDS, FAILED

I want to speak up, but the words can't seem to form. I feel so lost, so helpless, I feel so miserable so sad.

Wanna feel that again. Love.

Hoping

2010-08-05T20:52:00.000-07:00

Empty, betrayed, these feelings feel familiar.

Don't want to laugh, cause it will not help, but don't want to cry as it will make you worse. So what do you do?

Feeling like your hearts gonna fall apart, but that's not the end, soon you feel like your life is falling apart. And then here goes, it plays with your mind, thinking it will never end, and how much this person has done to you, it is impossible to stop loving them. Cause, the person who hurts you the most is the person who love most.

On top of that, no one understands how you feel, because it hasn't happen to them yet.

2010-08-04T21:12:00.000-07:00

HERE GOES ANOTHER

Another sleepless night. Dreadful. My mind is going 100/k an hour.

Long to be cared, love. But somehow it's seems so hard to get .

That's my moto.

2010-08-04T08:03:00.000-07:00

just one sentence, treasure your fucking love. with every fibre in you.

Who am i directing to.

2010-08-04T07:16:00.000-07:00

WHY MEN CHEAT AND LIE ABOUT IT.

Many out there would have dealt with this before. Boyfriend or husband cheating behind their partners back. I was curious why would they do this due to some events that happen and triggered, so here goes, why men cheat and lie about it.

Most women are good women, emphasis MOST, not all, most women. They cook, clean, take care of the kids, and attend to all her partners need, regardless how screwed up he can be, but that is women.

So it is worth it? Obviously not. One woman's love is priceless and words cannot begin to describe the greatness of it. And on top of that, when we add in a man's insecurity, it's really more heartbreaking to the men. Men do not want their woman to be with anyone else cept him, but yet he want to go fuck around.

Why men cant be honest. Simply this, men believe what woman don't know won't hurt her. Believe me, i hear this line thousands of times, but men do not know, how much it will hurt her when she finds out that it had happen for a long time. Sure, cheating hurts, but it wont hurt her if she does not find out. This is a fuck up and twisted logic that allows men to cheat. Irrational huh?!

Men knows woman cant take the pain and also maybe, MAYBE regretting that the woman fall for them. See, this is because cheating men know they will cheat, and a men who cheated once, will always cheat. I may be wrong in some cases, but majority they will. So they lie to cover the infidelity, though they have been caught. And ladies, men that has been expose of what they did, will not be ready to face the true self, simply cause of ego. He refuse or maybe not ready to look into his mistake and admit he is a cheat inside.

This is a most common case, they just want a new exciting event in their life. Men eat steaks every night, bound to wonder off for a hamburger.

Reasons of men cheating are much more intricate than those reasons above, but nevertheless no reason is good enough reason for being dishonest and unfaithful. And as the saying goes, " when the cat is out of the house, the mouse comes out and play "

Lets move away from this topic, its putting alot of rubbish into my head now. On the lighter note, with all the events that has been happening in my life in such notice, I got myself thinking a lot. And it made me realise I miss one part of my life so much. I may regret saying this, I may be wrong too, but I do miss my single life. The fact I dont have to worry so much, I dont have to think, I have a carefree life, fuck care life, I don't have that burden or responsibility more like it that I need to carry everyday. I am not saying I miss my clubbing days or days I am out dating a guy, I am just saying I miss that portion of my single life.

Yes, I agree totally, being in love is the greatest things, but it comes with a price. Many may be expensive, some may be reasonable. Please do not judge me when I say this or jump into conclusion, but I just want to be happy again. Blah. I shall stop.

I am still lost, I am still clueless, I just need one sign of guidance. Man I need to go to church again.

2010-07-15T03:48:00.001-07:00

SOMETHING TO PONDER

Would you regret on a decision you made, or on decision you did not make?

2010-07-11T22:00:00.001-07:00

ONE WORLD CUP, ONE WINNER, SPAIN!

Well there goes the World Cup for 2010. History has been made, and Spain is proud to be be holding the cup in their hands. Congrats to them! Once again Paul the Octopus has predicted again who will win again, and he was right. Man, how on earth did this creature did it.

The funny story is, now the Italians tries to steal Paul and claim that it has been capture in the sea off the Italian island of Elba, near Tuscany. Is just a damn octopus who can predicts the winner for most matches in the World Cup correctly, why do people need to do this kinda of stupid thing just for fame? Silly! As the match goes, it was really boring for the first half, not only that it is 4 in the morning here and I was awake in a pub watching the game, nearly doze off so many times. Even the damn coffee doesn't work! It's not like I am a soccer fanatic that stays awake just to watch the game, I have no idea how to appreciate soccer, just went there for the fun of joining the crowd. Sides, I am not working today, so what the heck!

Work's been alright, learning the new stuff, can't wait for my uniform to arrive. Don't have to wear all black again. Looks funny! Other than that, nothing much is going on. Social's life been down lately. Sigh.

Anyways, I have to wake the sleepy head up. Goodbye.

All Hail Paul. Pfft!

2010-07-04T05:29:00.000-07:00

ECLIPSE ! WOOO JACOB! OLALA!

I went and watch eclipse yesterday with the BF. OMG! The movie is just AWESOME! Jacob is so hot, Edward is just so, charming. Well he is not good looking but I like the way he care and love Bella. Sigh.

Anywhow at one part of the movie, I suddenly find myself understanding why Bella choose Edward, despite what she would get herself into, how much things she sacrifice and what not.

Now the question is this, would you be with someone you love more than anything in the world, but the catch is you would not have the life you had right before, you may have to sacrifice your friends, maybe also your family and maybe some of your dreams.

Would you be with someone, where you can be whoever you like, yourself and all, friends , you don't have to change anything. Just yourself, but the you don't love this person enough than the other.

So what do you think? Be with someone who completes you no matter what happens and whether the outcome is good or bad or,.....the other road?

Let's change the topic, I am starting my new job tmrw! * Screams! Full time Front Office. No more coming back at working for 4 or 5 hours at night, no more too little hours, no more crazy chef. YAY!.....NOT!! I think I will miss the flexible hours and all the short hours I get, but on the other hand, I need the money, I need the experience, so, here I go!

Im off, sleep. Morning shift tomorrow. Please God, hope it goes well! 8 Hours here I come!

2010-07-02T21:47:00.000-07:00

I AM BACKKKK!!! PROMISE!

Yo ladies and gents! What's up! Yes I know it has been a while since I last blog..

Just a quick update, things has been shaky for a bit, with friends, with parents, with the BF, with life, but its cooling down now, still cooling down, but hope it goes well. I am starting my new job in Front Desk on Monday, FULL TIME! I need the cash to keep me alive and I need cash to buy things too!!=( Been putting shopping on hold for a LONG LONG time!! SIGH! So goodbye restaurant hello Front Desk. Hope everything goes well * Finger Cross*

Other than that, it's been a while since I had a really good holiday. I really want to just go away, away from everything, from everyone, just go somewhere new, a stranger in a new town. And just be myself. My minds is all over now. I don't know what's going on with me. My brain is just, urgh! First I am thinking too much, second for that I am worrying too much, then I will overact, then I will just go moody. WTF!URGH! Go away!!!!

On that note, my poor Sony E phone is gone. Yesh. Broke into half. Don't ask how. Sigh I want to get a new phone! I want to get a Blackberry Bold 9700, but I need to wait till August. Yeah, gotta safe up. Aiks!

Anyhow, I am off. Done. Nothing to say. Goodnight!

Pretty huh!

2010-04-04T22:15:00.000-07:00

THE ORIGIN OF EASTER

First off, Happy Easter guys, hope you enjoy the chocolates and especially the long holiday.

I was asked how rabbits associated with Easter and also eggs, well I question myself that as well. What a Christian person I am eh! I looked it up on the net and I found the answer. It links to the Pagon celebration of the goddess Eostre where the hare is associated with this celebration. Eostre is also associated with fertility, that's where eggs comes in. The hare is a symbol of moon, where the sight first full moon after the first Sunday.

Rabbits appear as an animal that produces bright coloured eggs as a gift to children. Well it is a tradition in Germany, so no wonder our easter eggs are always so colourfully wrap!! LOL...

Anyways, Happy Easter again!

2010-03-31T02:00:00.001-07:00

ADD ONS

To add, I have been obsess with Facebook Social City, thanks to Shereen Mak Shuk Ling! Urgh!

2010-03-31T01:36:00.000-07:00

DON'T GET IT

Don't get it why people would want to hide their identity when kind of expose themselves so much on my blog? Why can't you just type in your name? how hard is it?

Anyhow, works been crazy, working in the morning shift is shyt!! Shyt shyt! 6.30 in the morning, who on earth wake up this early to have breakkie?? Un-godly un-human hour!!!! But is was a good experience though! I think I have made more coffees than drinking them! Damn!!

Since I have started working in this hotel, one girl has quit, 2 girls had cried, another 2 is leaving soon! OMG!! What have I gotten myself into??!! This is nuts! Is either the management people are that fucked up, or maybe I came in the wrong time.

Easter is coming up this week, which mean goodbye March! Sigh how time pass so quickly!! I have out of uni for 3 month already. Sucks sometimes, I do want to head back to studies, want to have the student life again. Weird I know, oh well. Autumn is around the corner as well, or should I say autumn is suppose to be here already, but the weather has been so fuck up, hot and cold, hot and cold, bloody PMS! The the other parts of the states have been raining, flooding everywhere, especially Queensland, and as for SA, NOTHING! So weird, when we are at the coast!

I have to go get my laundry now! PFFT!!

Toodles

2010-03-20T07:58:00.001-07:00

BUSY BEE!!!

Busy with work the whole week, been working since Sat till now! Basically! Well, it has been two weeks and work is good. Prefect actually. Hope this wont jinx it! Sides the fact that I have already seen two colleagues cause of some controversy at work, I hope I really won't be at that position. I know I will get scream at by the chef one day, just hope that one day...one day will not come till far far away =p.

But I love being at work, it takes my mind off things I don't want to be hearing and being at, attending peoples need than mine, yeah, good good.

Heading to Melbourne next month. For a short trip with the BF. Man, thinking about Melbourne, I do miss the crazy, on going, non stop party every weekend, and the people I have there. Sigh. What fun times I have, another chapter of my life.

I've been looking a little shabby lately, due to the fact that I have not been sleeping early, been waking up early as well. What am I suppose to do? I work till late, have to come back and eat, by the time all that is done plus shower and rest, it takes up about 2 hours, and that will be about 2 am already. But oh well, life must go on. Pfft!

Talking about 2, I am off to bed now, thank god I am off tomorrow, shall go for some dim sum and we ll see how it goes ! Ta!

Still wondering......

2010-03-08T04:33:00.000-08:00

THIS IS BULLSHIT...NOT LOVE..

The ticket is there, should I take it?

I am walking on a thin thread here, how much more?

Need or want?

Hope or silly?

Love isn't an equation, it is a free form at it's best

2010-03-06T18:35:00.001-08:00

BLANK

I still don't know what I want, and it is still not getting any warmer...so what now?

I need to find a sign, need to know this is right, need to know I am needed.

Third day of work, going good. =) One good piece of news. At least.

2010-03-01T23:52:00.000-08:00

PAUSE

My life has pause for some time now. I have nothing interesting happening in my life, nothing interesting to talk about, side the fact that I FINALLY GOT A DAMN INTERVIEW IN A HOTEL TMRW! After months of submitting my resume to hotels around, I finally got a call!.. One step closer. Hope everything goes well!

Will be working my ass of from tmrw for about a week. Money. Money. Money. That's motivating me to not call work and say I am not free. Working life is so dull!!!! I really wonder will I ever find a job I will be happy with. I always watch movies where they really enjoy going to work. These people have the motivation to get up in wee hours of the morning to work. I wonder will I ever be in that position one day.

I wanna start taking piano lessons, I mean, I do have the basic skills, but to fill my time. At the same time, I am so lazy. URGH! I wanna study, I honestly still want to study. I can't see myself in the working field. I know I sound silly saying this, but I miss my uni days. Sigh.

Oh well, life goes on. Can't just sit and complain. Maybe next time.

I wonder what are they doing now.....

2010-02-05T08:10:00.001-08:00

IM LEAVING ON A JET PLANE

Yes I am finally leaving tomorrow, somehow it feels like I was never back. Hmm. Nevertheless, I am going to miss home, regardless. =(

Adelaide is hot like fuck now, that's one thing why I don't wanna go back, sides that, I have not gotten any reply from anyone on my job prospect yet. Sigh.

Anyhow, I am dead bored now. Shall sleep and get ready for tomorrow, what shall I wear??

ps some people don't know how to look at themselves before pointing fingers at others

2010-01-27T07:29:00.000-08:00

AT A CROSS ROAD

Today is officially the worst day of this month. Everything keeps getting worst and worst..

I want to continue on with this post, but somehow I don't really have the mood to express my feelings. So I shall stop now.

10 more days to go. Happy?? Neutral

2010-01-07T08:10:00.000-08:00

IT'S NEVER ENOUGH, IT'S NEVER RIGHT...

hey guys! happy new year. Sorry have not been blogging much, been a bit tied up for the past few days. Yes I am back in KL now, I am kind of grounded. Sigh. Long story.

Anywhooo, my Christmas and New Years Eve celebration was rather, hmm, how should I decribe it, rather mellow? Rather quiet and totally a different scene. Nope, no clubbing, nope not getting drunk, and yes I know, you can't believe it right. Oh well.

My New Years was "fucking" great start, note the " "...and from there till now, I honestly can tell you I am not enjoying one bit at all. It is not all cause I am grounded, but yeah, other things as well. Oh well.

Have you guys encounter problems like, when you are trying to change yourself from before, people tend to always bring the past back to you, when you are trying to run away from it? When you try to prove yourself you are changing and they doubt you so badly, that you think "what's the point"?

It is so frustrating isn't it? Everytime there is a constant pull that tries to make you fail? Sickening isn't it?

I don't get it, when the world wants us to change, but yet, still undoubtly wants us to fail, then why bother asking us to? and the fact that we do want to change for the better, and yet, they still want us to fail

So what now? Do we continute even though the world looks at us like that? Or do we just remain as how we are and let them accept us for who we are???

STILL AM...

2009-12-23T07:50:00.000-08:00

Why do I still feel so uneasy? I know it had been over a few days ago, but I stumble on something else accidentally, and I had all these questions coming in again.

It's like, I am being suck in in a whirl pool, and then suck out to the real world, and then, being suck in again. My head is going in circles, I want to stop this questions slamming into my head, but how?

AS WE BID OUR GOOBYES...

2009-12-23T04:55:00.000-08:00

Had a goodbye dinner the other day at Mel's, it was great. Us girls were reminiscing about our first days in LCB and always in Adelaide, about the crazy stuffs we did, drink, drunk party and so on. You see, Claudia and I use to head to the club twice a week every week, slowly it change to twice a month, and now, once in 4 months??
LOL, how much we change.

My results for my finals just came out and I can say, I am officialy a fresh graduate!!!wohoooo! And not to forgot to rest, 'WE ARE FINALLY GRADUATES!!'

Leaving for Melbourne tmrw, can't wait. Spending Christmas for once away from home, wonder how is it going to be like. Oh well. Need to shop, got the feeling, I am aleady having two overweight luggaes, what more, when I leave Melbourne. Oh boy!!

Well, I got not much to updates, no pictures from the dinner, will uploads more picutres from Melbourne. Well guys, have a Happy Christmas, and a Happy New Year.

TWO IS BETTER THAN ONE

2009-12-20T01:12:00.000-08:00

I still wonder every minute, the words I read keeps coming back, and keeps me thinking, what does he really meant?

I still don't feel like I belong, I still don't feel like I was wanted, why? Is it because of what I know? Or maybe it's because what my heart is telling me is true? I try to deny what I know, maybe it was meant for something else, maybe it was suppose to mean something else and I am interpreting it the wrong way? But, the more deny, the more I reject myself, it keeps coming on stronger, I start to doubt I am strong enough to keep this feeling down, to suppress and hide my worries, try to keep my smiles up, try to not think about it, but when I am all alone, it starts flowing back into my head.

"What does he feels? What is he thinking? Does he feel like how I do? Does he know what how I feel? Will I ever feel like I am wanted?"

Questions keeps running back and ford, looking for answers, looking for that little comfort saying " Hey, I am still here, here for you, always"

Maybe one day, just maybe one day in the future, not too long, I will have that feeling, the feeling I have been looking for from him, maybe just one day I will, but how far long in the future? Will there be a future?

Just maybe I guess, just maybe...

2009-12-18T19:42:00.000-08:00

JUST A THOUGHT

My minds blank, I can't think, I don't know what to think, I am confuse.

I was browsing through Reens blog, and I stumble something so cool.

2009-12-18T10:17:00.000-08:00

BOTTOM OF MY HEART

I am sorry, I wish there were more to prove the sincerity, nonetheless, I am only human. I make mistakes, and I am sorry.

2009-12-16T03:37:00.000-08:00

PICTURES

2009-12-15T22:24:00.000-08:00

A HELL OF A TRIP..

Well guys, I am done with UNI. Two in half years of uni, I am finally a degree student. Two sweet miserable, blood trenching, stressful uni, and now i bid goodbye!lol.. Drama!

Its been a week since I finish my last paper, what have I been doing? Nope, did not party, nope did not go shopping, just, stayed at home and rest. Be a good girl! And yes, I know, that's not me, but, oh well. Worked for 2 days, Sat was the last, Monday bf n i went for a one night trip to the country side, was a sudden trip. Took us 4 hours to get there, on top of that, silly boy did a crazy 270 drift., OMG, for that duration, I was just, blank. Was so blur!! Dammit! Found a place to stay, he calles it the " Killer CabiN" You know those movies, where tourist stays in those crazy run down cabin, yea, that was how he describe it. The killer would just appear out of no where with a knife standing right in front of you when you are sleeping and start killing you. Hah! Too much crazy movies eh? =p...

Beach was nice, town was small, deserted, boring, but a day away from the city was pretty cool. Came back the next day, and did nothing.
Was suppose to go cherry picking today, but the weather's crazy! 39 god dmn degrees outside! How the fuck people survice in this god damn weather man!

Anyways, shall upload the pics, facebook has already have them..

Another one week and I will be heading to Melb for Christmas and of course, SHOPPINGGG!! Really cant wait!

....................................................................

At times I wonder what is he thinking, sometimes sitting next to him, I feel so distant, and I ask myself, " Has his heart change? Is he getting bored of me?" Question starts coming into my head, and then, suddenly he can just turn it around and show me he still wants this, but just for that spilt second, it goes back to hell again. So, am I thinking too much ? Or what I am feeling is true?

I remember someone said, " Sometimes holding something too tight, you will eventually suffocate it, and it will eventually die" but then again, how much is too much?

It's been months, yet sometimes I fail to understand him, I still find that he is still not letting me in, that he puts a small line between me n him, and I can't shake the feeling that I am into this more than he does, it just scares me so that I might not just be someone important to him.
Though he does tell me things I wanna hear, I still have this thought he might be confuse, that he doesn't know what he really wants, there is no clear path or clear image of what he desire most, is he still here cause he is alredy here, does he know what I am doing for this relationship, does he even care? all these always linger in my mind, and it is really annoying,

I know I think a lot, but the fact that I don' want this to fail, I think I do have the right to think, then here comes the big question

" Why Am I Feeling Like This??"

I kinda lost myself, somehow looking back at how I am before and now, that small part of me has change, I don't know who am I anymore at times, Ive change myself and mold myself so much in this rship, at times I just wonder will it do any worth? Will it be different this time? Hoping is one thing, reality is another.

So, well I can say one thing, I want this which means I want this to work out, which means I will do anything to make this work.
The End!

2009-12-04T03:41:00.000-08:00

Counting down to ..............

3 papers, 6 more days till its over!!

eeeks. I'm feeling the gitters....

2009-11-27T20:10:00.000-08:00

STRANGER IN THIS ROAD...

I was bored, visited my blog, to know that I have not been blogging for a long long time. To be honest, I really did not know what to blog, my life have been a total roller coaster ever since I got back from Melbourne, well I can say its good and bad.

I've learn new things, ive met new friends, I've endure new things, things that I never in my million life would think I would go through and I guess most importantly, I get to share this with someone special.

Next week is my last week in UNI..more precisely, my last week in my degree, in Le Cordon Bleu, my last week as a student. Cant believe it, it seems like yesterday that I came to Australia to further my studies, i remember that I told myself I am on my own, first few months here was dreadful, the fact that I miss my friends, my parents, and my life back home. I was bumping around in KL for 6 months before I left for Aussie, and I loved it. Yes I know a bummer, but, I was so carefree, had nothing to worry about, sides the fact that Im going oversea, then when I was in Aussie, with classes, assignments, new enviroment, new friends...i felt the rush, i felt the adreaneline, it hit me, I am alone. I am on my own.

Now, I am preparing my last papers. I am handing up my last assignments this coming week, it really freaks me. How 2 in a half years have just gone by. I am now entering the working world, deciding where to go from now. What is my future gonna be like, is how I want it to be?
Oh well, I guess thats how life is going to be right? We study, complete our degree, enter the working world, find ur 'true mate" get married, have kids, retire, and die. The end!

Right now, I am stuck in between finishing my degree and the working world..the later ones, dun really wanna think of it. =/..

I guess, one step at a time huh....one step...

2009-11-22T18:58:00.000-08:00

DON'T BELIEVE YOU...

I don’t mind it
I don’t mind at all
It’s like you’re the swing set
And I’m the kid that falls
It’s like the way we fight
The times I’ve cried
We come to blows
And every night
The passion’s there
So it’s got to be right
Right?

No I don’t believe you
When you say don’t come around here no more
I won’t remind you
You said we wouldn’t be apart
No I don’t believe you
When you say you don’t need me anymore
So don’t pretend to
Not love me at all

I don’t mind it
I still don’t mind at all
It’s like one of those bad dreams
When you can’t wake up
It’s like you’ve given up
You’ve had enough
But I want more
No I won't stop
Because I just know
You’ll come around
Right?

No I don’t believe you
When you say don’t come around here no more
I won’t remind you
You said we wouldn’t be apart
No I don’t believe you
When you say you don’t need me anymore
So don’t pretend to
Not love me at all

Just don’t stand there and watch me fall
Because I, because I still don’t mind at all

It’s like the way we fight
The times I’ve cried
We come to blows
And every night
The passions there
So it’s got to be right,
Right?

No I don’t believe you
When you say don’t come around here no more
I won’t remind you
You said we wouldn’t be apart
No I don’t believe you
When you say you don’t need me anymore
So don’t pretend to
Not love me at all

I don’t believe you

2009-11-08T03:25:00.000-08:00

THE ATTACK..

Rihanna said..

"I was bleeding, I was swollen in the face," she said. "So there was no way of me getting home, except for, my next option was to get out of the car and walk. Start walking in a gown, in a bloody face. So I really don't know what my plan was."

Rihanna said although her wounds had long healed, she had flashbacks and scars inside.

"The thing that men don't realise when they hit a woman, it's...the face, the broken arm, the black eye, it's going to heal. That's not the problem. It's the scar inside.

"You flashback...you...you remember all the time. It comes back to you whether you like it or not. And it's painful. So I don't think he understood that," she said.

2009-11-05T00:21:00.000-08:00

SONGS THAT SPEAKS MY HEART...

Heart Broken girl (Parts of the song)

....You’re the only one I wish I could forget
The only one I’d love to not forgive
And though you break my heart, you’re the only one
And though there are times when I hate you
Cause I can’t erase
The times that you hurt me
And put tears on my face
And even now while I hate you
It pains me to say
I know I’ll be there at the end of the day...

...............I don’t wanna be without you babe
I don’t want a broken heart
Don’t wanna take a breath with out you babe
I don’t wanna play that part
I know that I love you
But let me just say
I don’t want to love you in no kind of way no no
I don’t want a broken heart
And I don’t wanna play the broken-hearted girl...No...No.............

......Something that I feel I need to say
But up to now I’ve always been afraid
That you would never come around
And still I want to put this out
You say you’ve got the most respect for me
But sometimes I feel you’re not deserving me
And still you’re in my heart
But you’re the only one and yes
There are times when I hate you
But I don’t complain
Cause I’ve been afraid that you would've walk away....

......Now I’m at a place I thought I’d never be…Oooo
I’m living in a world that’s all about you and me…yeah
Ain't gotta be afraid my broken heart is free
To spread my wings and fly away
Away With you.....

Hold On

Didn't they always say we were the lucky ones?
I guess that we were once
Babe, we were once

But luck will leave you cause
It is a faithless friend
And in the end when life has got you down
You've got someone here that you can wrap your arms around

So hold on to me tight
Hold on to me tonight
We are stronger here together
Than we could ever be alone
So hold on to me
Don't you ever let me go

There's a thousand ways for things to fall apart
But it's no one's fault
No it's not my fault

Maybe all the plans we made would not work out
But I have no doubt even though it's hard to see
I've got faith in us and I believe in you and me

So hold on to me tight
Hold on, I promise it'll be alright
Cause it's you and me together
And baby all we've got is time
So hold on to me, hold on to me tonight

There's so many dreams that we have given up
Take a look at all we've got
And with this kind of love
What we've got here is enough

So hold on to me tight
Hold on, I promise it'll be alright
Cause we are stronger here together
Then we could ever be alone
Just hold on to me
Don't you ever let me go
Hold on to me, it's gonna be alright
Hold on to me tonight
They always say we were the lucky ones

2009-11-04T23:56:00.000-08:00

PAST, PRESENT, FUTURE

Have you ever stop and think maybe the person beside you, or the person close to you is from the future??

Have you ever stop and think maybe you are from the past?

What if you could just travel through time to the past, and see bits by bits of your life? Failure, success..the joy, the tears, sorrows and happiness?? And what if you can travel back to the past and you cant fix anything that has happen? All you can do is just watch...

What if you could travel to your future? To see what and who will you be? To see who you will spent the rest of your life with? To see your first child been born? What if you know the day you die? The cause of your death? To see you lose the people closest to you? To see your love one die in front of you, feeling so helpless?

What if you cant control when will you just travel back time or travel to the future?

So what happen in the present? How are you gonna deal with it? How are you gonna live your life knowing all these events will happen?

So what if???

2009-10-22T06:21:00.000-07:00

ENOUGH?

When will enough be enough?

What will the deal breaker be?

What is the limit?

How to walk away?

2009-10-13T00:14:00.000-07:00

LOOKING FOR THAT MISSING FEELING

Is it me or things has change?

Been looking for that comfort for some time, but some how or rather, i am no where near to find it.

Am I just thinking too much, asking too much? Or things has really change?

I feel lost, in search of that comfort feeling again, hoping to find it again, but yet, I just don't know how say it out loud.

Teach me how, show me how.

2009-10-11T21:57:00.000-07:00

BORED AND MOODY!

I got a class in 2 hoours time, tryin to push myself to go to this silly lecture. SIGH!!

I am moody, like the god dmn weather, one day is sunny and warm, the next is raining and cold! mutha F!

I feel liike sleeping, really do, craving for alot of food! sighh!=(

I need a break, I need go on hols, i need to go somewhere!

blahh!!!

about to blow now!

2009-10-03T02:27:00.000-07:00

GO DOGGIE...FETCH!!

I am out of options.

2009-09-27T21:55:00.000-07:00

FUCKING GREAT START FOR A DAY!

First off my holidays was fucking boring! Wasted my hols! Did absolutely nothing, only me to blame!

I m back in uni, in the library waiting for my first class of my new sem.

I have a very emotinally and sensitive toilet-mate! LOLS!

FML!

2009-09-21T18:22:00.000-07:00

IN UNI ON HOLS!

I am currently sitting in front of the uni comp on my holidays, why? Cause the Bf has a group meeting and I need to get my stuff done so I have to follow him and btw it is 10 in the morning! FML!

Its already Tueaday, and I have done nothing but sit around my place and just watch Boston Legal. Sigh. well suppose to go Gold Coast, but it was cancel coz Bf parents here, then suppose to go Barossa, but Mel when back to Msia, so right now, I really wanna scream. Its my god damn hols, and I am not even enjoying it one bit! I need an activity =(

On the lighter note, another week and there goes September. And another 3 more months, goodbye 2009! oh no! Working life! yikes!

Urgh, im signing off now! Toodles.

Oh Selamat Hari Raya!

2009-09-20T03:32:00.000-07:00

PICTURES...

2009-09-20T02:29:00.000-07:00

THE BLOGGER HAS RETURN!

To all my long awaited blog readers (cheh)..i know i have not been blogging for about 3 weeks, but I have been busy with assignments, BF's, fights, preparation for exams and exams! Finally I am over with eveything!But not the Bf, still around!=p..

Been a heavy 3 week session, but I manage to survive, so far Uni is pretty tense, alot of work, alot of assignment, alot of things to study and so on, plus this time I have an extra responsibility, so yeah, but all good. Getting a hang of it. On holidays now, for a week plus. Bfs parents are in town, so wont be seeing him much, Mel's back in Msia for some family intervention, Greg is going to Melb on Tues, so, well, let see, left those that I have not keep in touch for damn long, or have not seen since I got back to Adelaide. Oh well, its gonnas be one lonely, quiet holiday.

I am gonna look for ajob next sem cause I have only 3 days of classes, might as well start earning some money, and hopefully do good in the hotel and to come back next year. Anyways, back to my busy past week, I have kinda not club so much already, I dont knw what came over me, but let see, I only hit the club like twice last month! Lol startting to grow old for it i guess! Other than that, I have a masqure ball that i attend too, it was pretty shyt, lol wasted money, err..i dont think i have anything else.

Pretty much my life is very boring already. Been staying home studying or in uni or with the chicken, nothing much. Oh well, Im gonna watchy my Boston Legal now. Shall updtae pictures some other time. Facebook has everything anyways.

Ta!

2009-08-20T01:11:00.000-07:00

HATIN THIS CLUB

Now this be the last time you did me wrong

No more laying up in your arms

No calling, saying you want me back

I'm packing my bags, what you think about that?

Stayed at home like a good girl do

But Tonight baby you got me sad and blue

I just heard about the girl in your car, y'all kissing at the bar

Got me crying

Ohhh, you got me hatin' on the club'

Cause you took my love

Oh you took my loveNow you got me like

You got me hatin' on the club'

Cause you took my love

Why'd you have to take my love

Whoahh

And you can be mad at me all you wantI ain't coming in,

I'll be waiting out front

Coming out the door with your girlfriend

You did me wrong boy tell me where our love went

Stayed at home like a good girl do

But Tonight baby you got me sad and blue

I just heard about the girl in your car, y'all kissing at the bar

Got me crying

Ohhh, you got me hatin' on the club'

Cause you took my love

Oh you took my loveNow you got me like whoahhh

You got me hatin' on the club'Cause you took my love

Why'd you have to take my love

WhoahhNow this is the sound of a broken heart

There's only one reason why we're apart

She never woulda made it to your carIf it wasn't for the club, I'd still have my love

We would still have usI'd still have my love

We would still have us

But now we're like

whoahhhh

Ohhh, you got me hatin' on the club'

Cause you took my love

Oh you took my love

But now, now we're like

whoahhh

You got me hatin' on the club

You took my love

Oh you took my love

2009-08-08T05:38:00.001-07:00

3, 2, 1 ACTION!!!

I feel like my strength has been suck out of my body! I feel so tired, and sleepy. Feeling like a old woman now!

I slept at 6 am today and woke about 11. DAMMIT!!

Went clubbing yesterday. Overall, it was very good, beside the big dramatic actions that happen last night, shouting on the streets, my friend throwing up, tears, and yelling and all.. What a night!
But it was good. It was good for me as I have not been clubbing for 2 weeks already, and I really need to release the tension in me. Melody came with me as well, first time clubbing with her and it was fun! Lol! She is one crazy girl!!

Got home, showered and slept. Woke about 11, ate brunch and started, you can imagine my body was running on low battery, it was so damn hard. Took a nap about 4 ish 5, and woke up 3 hours later feeling hungry!LOL!im such a pig!!
and now im here blogging, feeling I am gonna fall flat on my face on this table anytime soon! sigh!

Tmrw dim sum at 1 in City Zen! Wohooo! Damn long never eat Dim Sum! Yay!

Anyways, my body is aching like mad. I guess I shall go finish my work soon and rest.

TA!

2009-08-06T07:39:00.001-07:00

A SLACKING DAY!

yes I am slacking today!! did a little shopping today, weather was pretty good..windy onli..

came back..did a bit of buss law assignment and then i was watching tve then. Went dinner at cafe primo..had risotto..which I could not finish and then we watch GI Joe. AWESOME movie! well it is not the best..but awesomeee!! I love the guy!!! hes soooo good looking!! good body!!!sweeettt!!lol!!

Next movie, Ugly Truth and Drag me to Hell..wohoo!!!>..movie marathon!

Anyways..got to go sleep now!
TA!

2009-08-05T04:10:00.000-07:00

KANGAROO ISLAND WITHOUT KANGAROOS ( JUST THE DEAD ONES)

2009-08-05T03:59:00.000-07:00

MISSING IN ACTION!

hey guys! i know i have not been updating my blog for ages, sorry for the wait, but i have been busy with uni stuff and also alot of outing happening lately, which makes me even busier coz i need to catch up with my uni work!=/...yikes!!

anyways, nothing much happen lately, cept that i came back from kangaroo island not long ago. Was there for a 2 days and one night, it was good, except that u get from one place to another, you really need to drive for hours!!.. stayed in a penthouse!woohhhho!!soo niceee!!=)..

first day there was nothing great, just chilled in a beach a little, and at home, we could not get anywhere as we kinda of overslept. Suppose to see the penguins but we miss the tour!=(
The next day was pretty exciting, except for the part that we had to drive like hours to finish the whole island! well not me at least! but i was the navigator...lol!=)..

went to the bee farm, to the edge of the island, beautiful! saw some seals, well many of them! Lol..soo cute! wanted to take them home..
left the island about 5 ish and got home about 8...then something really extraoridnary happen to me...
as i was unpacking my stuff, i kind of turn on my shower, full blast of hot water!!..well steam started to build up, and as i was entering the shower, well i was already a lil wet, the alarm rang. Yes the fire alarm!HOLY FARKK!!!

i was freaking out like mad! called my friend and got dress and went downstairs and hide in my friends place...guess how many fire trucks came....

3...3 mutha farkin red trucks came!omg!!!!!!!!!ahhhhhhh!!how embrassing, though i did not face the crowd, but still!..aiyo! i felt dmn bad! the whole building had to evacuate and 3 fire trucks came !Im sooo sorryy!!!=/...but oh well..good experience!Lol..

thats my weekend..intresting huh! i wonder what next??!!hmmm..

anyways..pictures??yes yes...coming coming!!..

got to run now!! waiting for food to come...soo hungry!!sigh=(....fooooooddd!!!!!!

ta!

2009-07-27T08:17:00.001-07:00

THIS IS JUST FUCKING GREAT!!

Its 3 10 in the fucking morning, and I have a test tomorrow and I am still awake!

Why? I would like to know myself too!!

Never thought I could be this pist off!

2009-07-24T17:39:00.000-07:00

BATTLEFIELD-JORDIN SPARKS

Don't try to explain your mind
I know what's happening here
One minute it's love
And suddenly it's like a battlefield

One word turns into a war
Why is it the smallest things that tear us down?
My world's nothing when you don't
I'm not here without a shield
Can't go back now

Both hands, tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no, these times when we climb so fast to fall again
Why we gotta fall for it now

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for

Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?
Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?
Why does love always feel like

Can't swallow our pride
Neither of us wanna raise that flag
If we can't surrender then we both gonna lose
What we had, oh no

Both hands tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no, these times when we climb so fast to fall again
I don't wanna fall for it now

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for

Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?
Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?

I guess you better go and get your armor
(Get your armor)
Get your armor
I guess you better go and get your armor
(Get your armor)
Get your armor
I guess you better go and get your

We could pretend that we are friends tonight
(Oh, oh, oh)
And in the morning we'll wake up and we'll be alright
'Cause baby, we don't have to fight
And I don't want this love to feel like

A battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield

I guess you better go and get your armor

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for
(Fighting, fighting for)

Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?
Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?

I guess you better go and get your armor
(Get your armor)
Get your armor
I guess you better go and get your armor
(Get your armor)
Get your armor

Why does love always feel like?
Why does love always feel like?
A battlefield, a battlefield

I never meant to start a war
Don't even know what we're fighting for
I never meant to start a war
Don't even know what we're fighting for

I honestly don't know why do we have to fight,
I honestly why cant we just let it go,
I honestly don't understand why people sometimes don't get it,
I honestly don't know what are we fighting for

I don't know why must we be like this, right now, right here

2009-07-23T01:24:00.000-07:00

GOODBYE AND TAKE CARE..

I know I have not been blogging lately, cause I was busy with all my uni work and all. Trust me, my work load is like, the total amount of normal uni work compressed in 6 months, oh wait 3 months. I have 4 subjects in 3 months! Cant u believe that, but oh well, at least I get to graduate faster! HAHA! So far so good, I have one assignment to hand up this coming Monday and a class test this Tuesday, so there goes my relax weekend!!=(..

Sides that, todays already Thursday! How time flies man! OMG!! Soon, it will be my mid term break exam and holiday !Wohooo!! Gold Coast anyone? Oh talking about holiday, I am not going to Falls Creek anymore, due to personal reason, oh well, guess I had to let go that amount of money! Sigh. I could buy so much with that money! =(
Uni's officially starting next week for all the other courses in UNISA, so wohoo!!! The uni is gonna be sooo crowded, but then again, eye candies! YUM!! Todays bussiness law was seriously excrutiating! I really wanted to shoot myself! It was such a slow and painful death listening to that lecturer talk. He is soooo monotone, though he does give alot of details, but omg! JeeeeZ! Melody and I were like, "kill me plz!" We were like discussing how much he look like Peter Pettigrew from Harry Potter! LOL! Oh btw, Harry Potter really is a dissapointment Sigh. Funny but dissapointment!=(
Got one more day to get pass and thats it, I am done!! Weekends, for a new assignment, catch up on my bussiness law, get my Financial ready for my class test, and wohoo, new week! Yikess!!

..........................................

I am really sorry, and if I cant find any words to replace this or anything that can express how sorry I am, I would do it. Never knew it would turn out this way, and had no intention to hurt you this bad.

Nevertheless, never regretted what I have done with you, still glad that least we had that piece of sweet and happy memory to keep.

" To be with you" still wil be something I will remember.

2009-07-17T22:23:00.000-07:00

AGAIN AND AGAIN..NEVER ENDING ROLLER COASTER

I have tried to blogging again and again for this post, but somehow it will turn out to be very weird and emo. So i shall just skip it and not say anything I wanted to say before.

Anyways, 12 more days I will be leaving for Falls Creek, and in this 12 days, we will finalise everything. So hope for the best ofluck I guess.

Uni results came out yesterday for most of you, those you got the grades they wanted, Congrats, those didn't, well at least you know you have tried your best. So dont frown and be happy and work harder nxt time.

I think I shall stop and do my work.

Toodles!

Slow Dancing in a Burning Room

2009-07-15T05:58:00.000-07:00

the boy gave me this song today and it just brought bak memories and and i guess even some doubts now.. hahaha. blekk, neways, i think the lyrics are genius but if u really wana have a listen the best version i think is john mayer's "Where the Light is" album.

I think the song is about two people who love each other deeply and want to be together, but for one reason or another can't be because the circumstances of their lives won't allow it. They are enjoying their time together as much as possible, and are savoring their love while it lasts, but they know that the obstacles their relationship must face will make it impossible for things to last forever, which makes the situation that much more tragic.

............................................................

It's not a silly little moment
It's not the storm before the calm
This is the deep and dying breath of
This love we've been working on

Can't seem to hold you like I want to
So I can feel you in my arms
Nobody's gonna come and save you
We pulled too many false alarms

We're going down
And you can see it too
We're going down
And you know that we're doomed
My dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room

I was the one you always dreamed of
You were the one I tried to draw
How dare you say it's nothing to me
Baby, you're the only light I ever saw

I'll make the most of all the sadness
You'll be a bitch because you can
You try to hit me just to hurt me
So you leave me feeling dirty
Because you can't understand

We're going down
And you can see it too
We're going down
And you know that we're doomed
My dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room

Go cry about it, why don't you?
My dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room

Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?

.............................................................

neway, gtg now. missing the boy loads! 8 more days!

p.s. if u found this msg, good job!! hahah. jen asked me to help update her blog. hehehe. which kinda explains why there isnt so many colours this time. lols.this is the boy btw. miss u baby!

2009-07-11T23:07:00.000-07:00

FIGHT THE TEMPTATIONS

OKIEEE!! first off clubbing on friday night was goood!!haha..was nice going back and seeing familiar faces againn! There was 5 of urs..claud n i, farn, gren and jevin..good night..loads of boooze..fights and all..when back about 6..slept and woke up about 10 ish..so basically i had onli 4 hours of sleep!sighh..

ytd..didnt do much..did my finance work.!!holy shyt!!Its hardd!!!oh crap!!..i did till question 12 and i gave up!!dammit!!the guys when to HQ..well..onli one..the other 2 suppose to go, but unfortunately their pipe leak so, hafta rush back home, the nite ended slept and woke up this morning for yum cha!

weather is soo awesome today! but a lil chilly! greg and jevin went to get their grocerries as for me, im here and im gonna start on my assignment! yesh!assignment!!first week of class and I already have assignment due in 1 week plus! how nice!!

so i will go now! ta!!

11 more days!!!!!

2009-07-10T02:34:00.000-07:00

BLOG WARRRR!!!

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!blog war!!hahaha!! FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!HAHAHA!

hilarious!! I only have one comment..its no comment!! don't want to bring up old problem, neither wanna be the immature one. So WHATEVER!!!

sides that, omg is Friday again!! shyttt..how time past like that! and I haven start my assignment yet!!!sei lo! suppose to do it today, but then Greg came down to Adelaide. So I went and meet up wiht him. Pity him, his place got no electricity, so he had to bath with cold water this morning. And its winter! LOL!
So yeah, we chated alot, catch up on old times and all, he companied shopping abit, bought hair dye, and yes im playing to go crazy with my hair again. I pity my hair alot. Spoilt it like no ones business!haha..but then again! Im young! who cares!!

He came over, let him check his mail, and he started talking again and all. Funny funny, and suprisingly, we have alot of common fwens!! Suprise Suprise!!!!

Anyways, Im going clubbing tonight! Huh! This is going to be weird. Clubbing back here again, with all the history and all! HMMM!!i wonder what will happen tonight!! wonder ponder!lol!!

Its raining outside!!!!! It is gonna be shyt cold man!! Sigh what to wear what to wear!!!hmmmm!!!!=(

anyways, im going to sleep now, need my energy! see ya guys!

ps guys, pls stay out of this stupid thing! its the past, its best not bringing it up, later it gets worst than what it is alrdy! So plz! leave it b ya!

2009-07-06T03:38:00.000-07:00

CHILDISH NO?

Classes starting tmrw! Pretty excited in a way, but thinking about it, I am gonna be loaded with assingments and exams and all! Sighh! Back to the old life!

You know what else, I guess I really pist my ex off! lol. To the extend that I was deleted from his Facebook! Wow!!!But omg, deleting account on Facebook, isnt that a tad too childish? LOL! When I found out, I was honestly laughing, dont know to be angry, or confused, or just laugh. But anyhow, if you are still reading my blog, then I am sorry I guess for whatever I have done. Which I dont know what; but yeah.

Other than that, nothing else. Thinking of going to bed early since I got nothing to do. The boys coming home tmrw, well back to KL at least from Bangkok. I m thinking what he has for me.HEHE!

Gtg ta!

ps reen , can read now anot??!!!

2009-07-04T04:52:00.000-07:00

Mt BULLER

Welcome to Mt Bluller

The view is just..breath taking!

Me on the lift!Scaryy!

On the way to Mt buller

More pics on FB!

2009-07-04T04:33:00.000-07:00

ANOTHER DAY....

Sigh! I am on Sat night! What a life man! I cant believe this! I want my class to start now! Soon! IM gonna rott so much here!

Sides that, I ve move in my new plc alrdy. Cant complain much about it, sides I want a bigger bed and a bigger room space. LOL! This room is too small to fit my shyt! The kitchen is outside, which mean I have to bring my cooking utensils out of the room and cook, but I am so lazy; hence no cooking; hence diet; hence good way to lose weight!

I need something to do. I have watch 2 movies today on my lappie, and I am still bored! It s only 9 oclock, but my bed looks really tempting. So I might hit the sack early tonight!=)..

Anyways, here are the piitures for Mt buller. Have fun!

19 more days! Geez! Long!

2009-07-03T00:21:00.000-07:00

WHAT A DAY!

sigh..i really do hate the weather in Adelaide, wait in Australia!! Today I walk out, with the sun glaring at me, next thing I know, I have to take my blardy umbrella out!! Then I hate walking in the rain because all the water splashes up my leg when you are walking! Asss!! I went through one packet of tissue because of this!! Damn funny!!

Went to city to do some blardy chores, thought I could submit my form for IELTS exams, but little did I know I need my passport! #$%^&*(!!!! This is seriously madness!! Fine, then was walking around getting my last mintute stuff before moving in my new place and it started pouing again!! WTF MAN!!!
Then when and get lunch for myself, this stupi nigro bitch really didnt use her head!! Ordering food, out the sudden lean infront of me to get cutleries. I look at her and say " Do you mnd?!!" POS!!!!no brains lady man! IDidot!!!...urghhh!!!
Then when i go back, the sun came up!! Weather is seriously playing with me!! sigh!

He just left for Bangkok, sigh! No one to company me! Aiyo Classs!!Please start soon! I need something to get rid of my boredom!!!Sides that, I am moving in to my new place tmrw. Which kinda suck, cause I will be the only person there as everyone is on holidays. Yes 3/4 of the students staying there are all Msian. How nice. Lol.

Gtg now. See u!

2009-07-02T04:52:00.000-07:00

FROM THE BEGINNING..

Its been a week since I left Melb, and it seems like forever!! OMG!!

Uni is starting next week, and honestly I want classes to start soon, cause Im bored to death. How funny it is that I am so mellow here in Adelaide, compare to Melb and KL, everything is so different. I am always out at night, I am always with people, but here, its so quiet. It is good in the way that I can study here, friends asking me to go Melb and transfer credit, but omg!hell no. Looking at all of them, dont go classes and all, but well, all good. Im happy that my parents made me come here, sad in the way coz I feel like im seperated from people.
6 months! 6 more months!!
I so wanna be in KL right now. Everyone is back. Everyone is having hols, but me, oh god! Classes!

Sides that, I change my layout on my blog. I was dead bored right after dinner, and so I decided to change.

Is it me, or is this really happening?
Is it me, or is it you?
Is is me, or is this us?
Is this me, or am I just thinking too much?
I wanna feel like before, like before

2009-06-27T23:54:00.000-07:00

UNI UNI UNI UNI!!!..

arghh!!Im heading bck to uni tmrw!sighh! while my other fwens r having fun back in KL, I am back in uni again! Duff!! What a life!

anyways, nothing much from here, to you guys going back for holidays, haf fun, and see you back soon ya! Kisses!!!

Missing you guys!!!

to the girls out there, if you haf a lover, or a bf or a guy that is gonna break ur heart, or broke ur heart..a line for you to say to these asses..

" i am the best thing that happen in your life; it may not be today, or tomorrow, but it will be the in future that you will regret leaving me"

..............................

You tell me you're in love with me
Like you can't take your pretty eyes away from me
It's not that I don't want to stay
But every time you come too close I move away

I wanna believe in everything that you say
'Cause it sounds so good
But if you really want me, move slow
There's things about me you just have to know

Sometimes I run
Sometimes I hide
Sometimes I'm scared of you
But all I really want is to hold you tight
Treat you right
Be with you day and night
Baby all I need is time

I don't wanna be so shy
Every time that I'm alone I wonder why
Hope that you will wait for me
You'll see that you're the only one for me

I wanna believe in everything that you say
'Cause it sounds so good
But if you really want me, move slow
There's things about me you just have to know

Sometimes I run
Sometimes I hide
Sometimes I'm scared of you
But all I really want is to hold you tight
Treat you righ
Be with you day and night
Baby all I need is time

Just hang around and you'll see
There's nowhere I'd rather be
If you love me, trust in me
The way that I trust in you

Sometimes I run
Sometimes I hide
Sometimes I'm scared of you
But all I really want is to hold you tight
Treat you right
Be with you day and night
Baby all I need is time

2009-06-27T06:35:00.000-07:00

PICTURES...!!..

the boy

winter white

2009-06-27T00:23:00.000-07:00

HELLO FROM ADELAIDE..

hey guys!!im back in this shythole! sighh!!!but oh well..i guess i gotta tune down to my study life style after the parytyin i haf done in the past 6 months in melb~!!sigh...and just to realise i dun really need to come bck so early coz my whole week will b just orientation!!cibai!=(

okok.mt buller was great..was awesome..skiing was tough..putting on the gear was a challenge..and walking in them was another...then skiing..just 2 hours of lesson..my dad ask me to go on the big terrain..crazyy!!!i got scared of of my bones man!!i fell down on my ass on my aleg..on my hands like countless times...well the next day i was pro alrdy..i chud go on a snake..( not very ood..but good enough)..i didnt fall at all..so yay!!..
the next time im in falls creek im gonna snowboard!!!..i cant wait!!=)...

sides that..im stayin in a hotel at the mean time..waiting for my accom to b ready..mum n dad r leavin this tues...im starting uni this monday!wohoo!!>.cant wait sumhow..pretty exicted!! im at uni..my last year n all..gonna graduate..holy!!!2.5 years just pass like that!!sigh..scary shyt!!!!sides dat..been hanging out wit claud ere..miss the old times when me n her will just go out on grocerries with her bf..and the time they fight n all..golden!hahha..
but well at least the bf is dmn patient with her n all..let her scold..pinch..whack..call him names n all..and just b quiet and b nice to her...UNLIKE SOMEONE!!!dmn useless!!sighhh...

anyways..got to run..the boys online..!..n if ure reading this...yes yes.. miss the boy alot...( ahem ahem ahem..)..haha..
hugss!!

2009-06-21T06:52:00.001-07:00

SKI, SNOW AND SLIDE

Hey guys, another 4 more days in Melb and I am off to hell- land again.

I am headin up to mt buller tmrw wit parents, yes i am going skiing. I am gonna do a trial run before i head up to falls creek. Just incase I really cant ski, so when I go up to mt buller, I will do something else. Snowboard perhaps? Hah! In my dreams. I prolly need those pading you put on my ass after that! Sigh=(

my gosh, thinking about leaving melb, it has been 6 months ever since I got here, and the amount of events I went through, just unbelieveable. I had no one here when I got here, just a couple of friends, and I met a few here and there. Then soon, when uni started, theres when all the fun, and dramas came along. 6 Months has past, and now I am gonna head back to Adelaide, to finish up my course. OMG!!!!! I am freaking graduating this year. Gonna b a woman now. A working woman! Have to survive on my own. Maybe I should just mary a rich guy, and shake leg for the rest of my entire life. ( Hah, dream on)

But the worst part is, saying goodbyes. I ve said too many goodbyes, too many times, and each time, it is damn hard. Especially when there is someone involve, or people close to u, departing from them is the hardest thing to do. But oh well, life goes one right.

I shall take some pics and put onto my blog when I have the time (which is like 2 weeks till i settle dwn in Adelaide)..ehe..

c ya guys! Have fun! Wont be bloggin for a while.

Toodles!

We're standing face to face, hand in hand
as the evening twilight drapes its arms around us
Everything seems to melt away
and all I can see is you, smiling at me

2009-06-16T15:32:00.000-07:00

NEW START..

Currently listening to Ka BU Liau Kou

Hey guys! How you guys been? I know some of u are having exams, so good luck! Those who have finish, get the party started!!

I know my blog has been dead for a few days, well I have been busy with my work-free days!!lol..

On Sunday, I went to Dandenong. Well everyone tell me its damn awesome there, so I might as well give it a try. The weather was great. NO rain, not that cold, so it was good. The drive was alrite, got lost twice, yes I am a bad navigator!=(...Had pie when we reach there, walked a bit, bought some wine for work, ( I am a nice staff ok), then when to this place for scones. Whoa! I love it htere. It has this beautiful garden, mainly for weddings an all. Awesome!!

I drove back dwwn, aiyoo, i dun think I can drive in the city man! LOL.

Other than that, been just chilling, Aaron Leong left Aus already. Hope everything went well for him, and I shall see him when I get back to KL year end (Hopefully)...

I cant believe it, itsalready the 17th! Another weak, and I am leaving Melb! Mummy and Daddy are here already, waiting for them to leave the airport. Sighh!! So much of having fun in Melb. Parent ere! Yikes!
I woke up today, realise that, I am about to leave Melbourne, come Sunday, I have to start packing already. Sigh =(. Somehow, its gonna be hard for me to leave here, worst than leaving Port Douglas. Hated so much over there.

Daddy wanna go up to Falls Creek for a night. Wohoo! Teach we skiing wo . Aiyoo!!!=/ Scare!!

Anyways, got tot run now! Toodles!!

Have fun!

2009-06-11T02:01:00.001-07:00

SNOWED?? IN THE CITY???

Apparently it snowed ytd nite, well weee early in the morning, in the city. Freaking snowed in the city???!! I wannna seee!=(

But sadly, I doze of ytd pretty fast cause I was heaps tired!

My last 3 hours at work, and I AM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Booooyahhhh!!!

Fridays tmrw!! Clubbing anyone?? My last clubbing in Melbourne =(

My 'friends' are still here. Mr Cold and Miss Cough do not wanna leave me alone!! Annooying! I cant even breath while I am sleeping! POS!

I nearly had a heart attack today!! My heart nearly leapt out of my chest!I was this close, so close of exposing myself. Lucky I am fast. But, I cant do this for long.. No NO!!

I wanna go Dandenong!!!! I dont care whether is it going to snow or what, I WANT I WANTT!!!!

Got to run! TA!

2009-06-10T00:58:00.001-07:00

THE COLD AND LONG WINTER NIGHTS

OMFG!!! Winter is here, and it freeezzingg shytt cold!!!! Yes its kinda my fault, as I still go out with short shorts and spagetti T, with a jacket, but still !its wet and its cold! The highest temp today was 10 degrees, and honestyly I could not even move out of bed!

My nose is block, I cant smell, I cant taste! Damn fark up! But one thing is good, at least I am excersicing my diet plan really well!! Haha! Need to lose these 3 kilos I have gain! And I wanna go back to how I was before, before like 3 years ago! I was looking back at all my old pictures on my lappie and, my tunny! FLAT! ABS!..now..bloated and bouncy!!=( Sobs!

I was going through my stuff, packing a little bit at a time, when I kinda stumble onto this A4 size paper. I thought it was just rubbish when I decided to unfold them, and there it was. I thought I lost that paper a long time ago, but it was sitting in my bag all along. I read it, re read it, and read it again. And there was this sudden rush into my head. Short vivid images came rolling into my head and somehow, my heart sank.

I quicly snap out of it, and decided to put that paper away and continue packing, when I just realise as well there are things, small things that honestly reminds me everything.

Funny it is, how even the shortest period, but the happiest times brings back the most hang on memories. Piece of clothing, the way someone walks, eats, talks, how they sleep.

But oh well, like what Sher said, maybe is for the greater good. Fresh start, new place, new friends, new guys, and new adventure. New drama? Always!!!LOL

Anyways another 3 more hours to go. Its raining non stop. And I hate walking in the rain!!! Blahh!!

2009-06-09T00:27:00.000-07:00

SLEEP AND MORE SLEEP

In these pass two days, I have been sleeping for 26 hours!!
Why??

Cause I suddenly had very high fever on Monday morning. Well I kong-ed out at 2am on Sunday, cause I have already "up there"..the next morning, my body was aching, and my body was heating up. Pop 2 pills, trying to make myselg sweat, which is hard cause I can't sweat easily. Pop another 2 panadols 4 hours later. Slept till about 6 30. Well, evetually my fever came down.

Worst, it kinda killed my taste bud!! I came back from dinner and pop another 2 more, just incase the fever came back and always I was having a bad migrain! My head is killing me! Slept about 12, woke up around 11 today.
Migrain was even worst, i was seriously crying for my mum !!!! Force myself to get up, eat a little, as I have not eaten a proper meal the day before; took 2 breads and pop another 2 panadol for my migrain. So total up I took 8 panadols in two days. And I am about to pop another, cause my migrain is acting up again and I am at work!!
My gosh! I wanna kill myself so badly now.

And I am really freaking myself out. I kinda check the Swine Flu symptoms, and it was like this

-fever, which is usually high, but unlike seasonal flu, is sometimes absent (check)
-cough (check)
-runny nose or stuffy nose (check)
-sore throat (not really)
-body aches (nope)
-headache ( Migrain counted?)
-chills (cold)
-fatigue or tiredness, which can be extreme
-diarrhea and vomiting

-Flu-like symptoms improve but then return with fever and worse cough (yes, I was healed, and now i got it back again)

How !!!????!!!3/4 of these symptoms I check every of them! OMG im freakin out right now. Should I go to the doctor???=(

I got another 2 more days at work and I am fre!!! Yay!!! Cant wait to just get out of this uniform !!

15 more days and counting..

....................................................

It's all because,

I waited for so long,

you showed me you were the one,

I gave you my heart,

right from the very start so,

Every time you lied, I knew a side,

Get another chance,

I was hurting I was broken I stayed so long and that’s why you didn’t think I’d move on,

It’s all because,

I loved ya (because)

I held ya (because)

I believed ya (because)

you’re not what I needed,

I’m stronger, (because)

I’m better (because) without ya,(because)

You thought I’d be in peaces,

(because) (you thought I’d be in peaces)(Because)

I loved ya (because)

I loved ya (because) I loved ya You gave me,

just one thing, but taken from the beginning

You left me a heart ache,

how much more could I take,

With every alibi that made me cry I'd still give you more,

I should've given up, when I had had enough,

But I stayed too long, that's why,you didn't think that I'd move on,

It’s all because, I loved ya (because)

I held ya (because)

I believed ya (because)

you’re not what I needed,

I’m stronger, (because)

im better (because) without ya (because)

You thought I’d be in peaces,

because (you thought id be in peaces)

I loved ya (because) I loved ya (because)

I made a mistake of giving me to you,

I made a mistake of giving me to you

It’s all because,

I loved ya (because)

I held ya (because) I believed ya (because)

you’re not what I needed,I’m stronger,

(because) I'm better (because) without ya,

(because)You thought I’d be in peaces,

because (you thought id be in peaces) because,

I loved ya (because) I loved ya (because)Because,

because I loved ya

2009-06-06T18:27:00.000-07:00

FRIDAY, CLUBING, DRUNK = JEN'S USUAL

Clubbing on Friday, was..er abit off. The club was totally empty cause of the exams period.

I went inside with a different group. Totally new group.

Fun yea, drunk Hell yeah!

Pictures? Soon.

Sick. Yes, maybe, AGAIN!...THANKSSS LAAA!!!

2.5 hours of work to go!!

Hungry? Nope, but I really want Krispy Kreme now!

17 more days to go. Um hmm! 10 more days till paretns here.

2009-06-05T03:39:00.000-07:00

EMO PARTY..

so weird on the phone today??!!!

why is everyone a little distress on the phone. !WTC!!

something is wrong today man!. Even my dad sounds funny!!

Seven tonite!! Yesh! Party!
Sides that, please, anyone who knows what happen, do not go posting comments on my blog@ Its water under the bridge already. Done and Settle. Do not make it a big fuss! OKAYYY!!
Thank you!!

.....................................

I am being really patient here. I am seriously am! And I do not know how much i can bare!

2009-06-04T00:43:00.000-07:00

ZOOM ZOOOM ZOOOM

Bahh!! another 4 more hours to go!!

BAHHHHHHHH!!

fast fast!!i need a drink soon!! Work is drving me up the wall!!

Other than that, I feel like eating Pan Mee now, as well as Chicken rice, as well as my mummy home cook meal, as well as Mcds, as well as Max B! OMG CRAVINGG!!

on the lighter note, wanna do something random. Wanna take a guest car and just zoom off for an hour or so..I would dare, If this job wasnt so important for me. LOL!!!
And I have no idea whats wrong with me. Been parking cars so close together. If a person with the size of hmm, Carl, I think gone case. Can't get in. LOL! Sorry Carl. Saje!

Love

2009-06-03T07:05:00.000-07:00

ME AGAINST THE REST

Today, I finaly am out from
Drama Rama! DAM HIGH SCHOOL MAN!!
the dark.

I finally knew everything. Everything finally is clear.

I cant wait to leave! I honestly cant! N I cant belive I am saying this. And I know some wants me to leave too. So be glad

Another 20 more days!

One week of stress, and dramas, all I need is everything to die down.

Wheres the boy when I need him huh??!!!
STONE!!

Great answer!

2009-06-03T01:51:00.000-07:00

WHO CAN YOU TRUST..

So, it what circumstances can you trust someone with anything??

You think that when you have his/her back all the time, whether right or wrong, you hope he/she would have your back no matter what. But what if, it doesnt happen that way? What if, they decide to go against you? What should you do? Confront them? Forgive and forget?

I found today, that someone close to me that I trust would back me up no matter what, just hurt me so much. I had that persons back even though I just knew XXX ( not going to name names here) not long ago. I had XXX back whatever happen, and I was utterly speechless to see what XXX has done.

So the question here, should I just let it go and forget about it, or should I confront XXX? But I dont want to create a big fuss here. I just cant get this frustration out of my mind!! E told me to give XXX the benefit of the doubt, and it may seem like XXX is helping out.
I am trying to give this a shot, BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT, maybe XXX is trying to ease things up, but honestly, I cant. I juust cant.

I really need to blow off steam now!

This song has been stuck in my head since last night, I wish I could hear those voice again.

2009-06-01T15:27:00.000-07:00

GLOOMY, SUNNY DAY

We have decided to patch things up, regardless how many people are against us.

My mind is seriously farked up!!

Actually maybe I am just greedy. Am I making the right move?? Despite how many people are actually telling us is a bad bad move.

Sigh.

22 more days and counting.

Mummy and Daddy are comin in 15 more days! WEEE

22 days and counting.

2009-05-30T21:27:00.000-07:00

FROM ZERO TO HERO!

84 departures with 3 staffs on the desk! WTF!!! Total up, I ve brought up at least 30 ish cars in like 4 1/2 hrs! My legs are killing me!! Half an hour till I finish work! Cant wait.

Im off tmrw!yay!!

Ytd was my last wedding. It was awesome. Saw some eye candy. I think ytd's wedding was different from the others. I think the speaches was much better, music was ok ( No Michale Bubble for once) the bride did something out of the ordinary, and yeah it was good. Or maybe coz it was my last wedding, so heh! =(

Im so hungry, and tired, exhausted. My mind is everywhere. Just want to drop on the bed and sleep!! was freezing this morning as well. 7 degrees! geez!!

Swine flu in Aus has rocked up to 212 already! Crap! I am still having my flu, does that make it 213?!! NOOOUUUU! Scaryyy@!!
Anyways, got to run. Bye

Oh no clubing pics, Didnt go =/

2009-05-29T18:02:00.000-07:00

TAKE THE LEAP

I know i mess up..

I can't be like this,

Maybe I should change.

LOL..

Who am I kidding..

2009-05-28T16:59:00.001-07:00

FLY ME TO THE PAST...

swine flu's doubling up in Vic???!!!!

shytt!! freakky!!

im freaking out coz im having this flu since a week ago! should i see a doc??!!
crap!!

other than that, clubbing tonight! wee! feels like the last night clubbing cause the rest having mid sem next week =(..

anyways..got to run!
cioz

2009-05-27T16:19:00.000-07:00

GOOOO MESSI!!!!!!

5 more hours to go! FARK ME!!!
urghh!!

Go barcelona!!! Though I only like Messi, but! wohoo!!!

Randomnesss

2009-05-26T20:13:00.000-07:00

WORK's A TOTAL BITCH!

I hate work.

Work is making me miserable now.

3 more weeks till I am done. 4 more weeks till I leave =(.

Work is still a Bitch.

Putting me on for 5 days straight and giving me a one day break, this sucks!

I hate my working life!!

Social life is sky rocking! Loving every bits of it. That's what making it so hard for me to leave Melbourne.

Craving for starbucks now! MMMMMM Caramel Frap.

Missing the boy.

Missing the babe in KL.

2009-05-25T20:43:00.000-07:00

Partyyy, Booozeee. Scandals. And keep it coming!!!

2009-05-25T20:17:00.000-07:00

HEY BOYS AND GIRLS!!

olllla!!I know its been a while since I came and update my blog, I have been busy!!!!Yea I am always busy ok! I got a high, and large social life to keep up too..=p..

Anyways, nothing new, been hanging out with the girls and the boys, clubbing as usual, was Jersey night on Friday, and I went with Italy. Sadly, no one live up to the event. We were the only fews that were outstanding and brave enough to go with our jerseys.=p..had a pretty ook night, till Joyie was knock dead. So had to send her home, then Kah Jin , Jaysten and I went to Chili Malam to meet the rest of the gang. As usual, we like coyottes that have not been eating for days, i ordered 6 dishes for 5 people...and 3 girls were present..think!!how much we ate.i ate indigestion after that, went back to Ernest place and threw everything up!! slept over, woke up next day and left for Joyies place..

my weekend was gone like that, I finally had my sze chuan food, it sucks though, it wasnt spicy enough for me, and Ernest was swiming in his sweat..lol!! pity pity!!!im working tmrw till sunday!!5 dyas of work straight, and im heading to the club on fri great man!!! and im still sick too!!very very sick! was walking under the rain ytd, my cold is bad!..sighhh..=(..

anyways..im uploading the pics now..haf fun!!

2009-05-20T05:02:00.000-07:00

HAHA!

I finish my steak, he didnt!

HAHA!!

I got a new phone!!wohoo!!I got my X1 phone! Weeee!!!It is one difficult phone to function man!Oh gosh! First time I need a manual to know how to work the phone.
Wooppsiiieee!!!

Randomness!!

2009-05-18T15:58:00.000-07:00

NOOOUUU...

" Good morn.g, thank yo for cal..Sebel hot. This ..Jennif..How can I he..you?"

This is how I speak on the phone. Break!

2009-05-18T00:58:00.000-07:00

I AM STILL WHO I AM..

Currently it 6 pm on a Monday night, I am at the back to the desk, blogging. Its pretty quiet today, though we have like around 20 ish more arrivals to come in. The other collegues are in the restaurant having drinks because 4 of the hotel staffs are leaving next week. Hmmmmm.
And my collegue and I are sitting behind this desk stoning. WTF!! Great night!

To top that off, I am sick. Oh boy. I am very very sick. I am having a bad cold, cough and i lost my voice totally. So, I ven been trying to minimise my talking, but doing front desk, aint easy.
E was ncie enough to coem ytd night to Joyies place to nurse both Joyie and I. Yes, Joyie fell ill first then now me. So, he bought me flu med and put me down to sleep and we headed to dinner after. Well being a stuborn girl as I am, Joyie and I went to Fredos for ice cream. BTW we had indo me for lunch! How to heal man!

We all headed back to Joyies place, chilled for a while, i kinda doozed of on E's shoulder. Pretty whack up.

Oh clubbing on friday was AWESOMMMEE!!! I wasn't drunk, high a little, but it was good. Met a guy, have no idea where is was from. He told me, but kinda forgot. =.=

Left the club, when to Cili Malam, as usual we ate like animals that have to eaten in days, or weeks!!. Left without paying AGAIN!lol..
I was losing my voice already. I pretty drank alot, but..no kick. I guess it was the milkshake!haha
Joyie, Shereen, Dan, Jaysten and I walked back to Dan's plc, but I didn't want to stay over, so I headed to E's place. He was already stone from smoking up, but was sweet enough to walk to Dan's place and walk me to his place.. Showered and slept like a baby. The next day, I knew i was dead, cause i lost my voice.! Beautiful!
I am freaking out right now, because of this stupid sickness. what happen if it turns out to be the stupid swine flu. Oh gosh!! nonononono!!!!HOWWW!! maybe I should get it check out. EEEKKKK!!

Anyways, got to go now, the hotels picking up Guest are now coming in. Brilliant!.

Ta

2009-05-10T18:50:00.000-07:00

TAKE THE JUMP..

Hey guys!! currently eating crunchy nut cereal at 12 pm at Dans plc..hungryy!!

My weekend has been very ..hmm entertaining with loads of drama and heartbreakes. I aint gonna go into the details, but it was rather refreshing and eye opening for me. How so? Well, to see yoursself before in someone else its not good, its like, you have to go through the same shyt again and again, reminding yourself, how stupid and how naive you once were. But on the other hand, I get to give my life experience advice, ( depending the person would wanna listen to me or not)..

On Fri I found out my shift was cancel, so I decided to stay over in Joyies place( which i think thats my second home alrdy)..so yeah, had dinner with Nerst while waiting for Joyie to finish her date. Ordered Indian food in as we both were too dmn lazy to get out of the bed. Ate dinner, chilled den Joyie came back. We watch Burried alive. Pretty cool show. Gory though. Both Nerst and Joyie were honestly scared. Suprisingly, i wasnt. !!Hmmm shows like this seriously gives me the creeps but now it doesnt!Anyhow, th night ended pretty early for us, as usually Friday night we usually club.

On Sat however, i accompanied Joyie to the vet..Ibby was getting his next vaccanation. Then she n i wen shoping arnd, bought a few things, well i kinda bought two new pairs of shoes thx for her!! ISHHH!!!..I honestly have no idea how am i gonna bring all my heels back to Adelaide. I am doom!. =/..
The night came, the girls and I got ready to head to Lavish. It was one of our friends friends brithday, they kinda book the whole back club.. Arnd 1 am we got in, well honestly i can tell you it isnt great night. I had fun, but wasnt great. Music abit boring, i was still sober ( for 3 weeks straight..PROUD)..There was a bit of dramaS in between, but no biggie, other than that, it was alright. Head to Chili Padi after that (FINALLLYYYYY)...was hungry...Head back, had a chat with Joyie and lights off!!

Sunday, work! Sigh! The hotel was soo quiet! I was standing on the desk all night long, as my 2 collegues was..well..they had a long night, and they came in having a bad hangover. So they were resting behind in the office!God dammmittt!!!..
Suppose to head home coz I had work today ( Mon)..but shift got cancel again! So came to Dans plc and crash. We watch August Rush, pretty cool show. Damn sweet. Talked abit n went to bed. Now here I am, blogging, waiting for the 2 boys to get up, to haf lunch, which i m thinking its not going to be soon, So i might just head home soon..

I have pictures from Lavish, I shall post it up soon.

Got to run now! cioz!!

2009-05-07T12:35:00.001-07:00

ON THE SAME BOAT..

olllaaa!!! im backkk!!I know I have gone MIA for a while, well its cause Ive been busy!!

Work as usual, BORING!!..no biggie. Talking about work, I have about 5 more weeks till I am done with my intern, and somehow I feel like im not gonna get a good grade for my intern! Sigh..sides that, lifes been fun..nothing but FUN!...BEEN stayin over at Joyies the pass 3 nights..well..not only at hers but at Dans place too. Honestly I feel like a homeless girl hoping from one house to another! WTC!!! but I have only that much time in Melb, and I dont wanna spend it by travelling from my plc to the city, sides, I have much more fun and I dont have to worry about transport problem. Just that, when the weekends comes, I have to work, and they get their day offs! Bugger!!

We had a big dinenr the other day, well not really big, but yeah, I cooked! Spaggetti.
Though I know it wasnt the best meal ever, but, Hey since when Jen ever cooks! Yeah like once in a blue moon! And it was for 9 ppl as well!...soo shhhooouuchhh!!!...Joyie has been feeding me alot as well!..omg !i swear i can grow fat stayin wit her..like wut Nerst say, coming back home its like detoxing, while heading to the city its like fattening myself up!!sigh..my tummy is soo bloated already!

im heading to work in a while, sigh...at least im going clubbing tmrw!!instead on fri, im going on sat!weeeeeee..i know i haf no uploaded the pic on facebook, but i will soon. Have heaps of work to settle first!.

gtg now!..work work work...$%^*(!!!

ta!

2009-05-02T04:03:00.000-07:00

TOUQUAY AND SEVEN

joyie me and avanda

ernest me and joyie

new found GF-joyie

2009-05-02T03:56:00.000-07:00

FLYING HIGHHHH!!..

OMFG!! can u guys believe it!its already MAY!! Nearly half of 2009 is gooneee!!NOOOO!!..Time flies damn fast!! Especially when you are having fun! Just today last week I was in Torquay having fun and all, and now I am back ere..back at work!!=(..sobbss!!

A usual, ytd wen clubbing. It was PJS night, but aha..i think onli 1/4 of the clubbers wore PJS! damn funny!! Iyt was fun in the begining, i drank, i got high, i smoke..i "smoke"..hell yeha!lol..not bad not bad..but I kinda sobered up damn fast cause I was looking for Joyie!. Silly girl got me dmn worried. She was pass out in the toilet. Was looking for here nearly an hour. Sent out a search team as well!..lol..But lucky in the end, bouncer took her out, found her, took her home and put her to bed. Was at her place, stayed over coz i had work today at 11 am! Hero weii!!!...aiyoo..!!

Honestly I have not been stayin at hoe..i think out of 7 days i was onli home 2 days!!dammnnn!!i love itt..=)...Chiok is leaving on Monday!!sad!!=(..noooouuu!!Hope he misses his flight!shhh!!=p..

Anyways, I know you guys want pictures, so yes, I've edited it already, i'll post some on the blog, bu the rest will b on FACEBOOK ya!.

toodles!!

xoxo!!

2009-04-29T02:38:00.000-07:00

WHATEVER HAPPENS IN TORQUAY, STAYS IN TORQUAY

hey guys!!im back from the longest, the bestest, the happitest trip soooo far!!!...if u guys notice I have been missing frm msn n my blog for some days because i went for a trip to Torquay, its a small town outside melbourne city..i went wit daniel and his friends, met a few friends along the way too..
the trip was AWEESOMMEEE!!I LOVE IT SOOO MUCHHH!!..

..on friday..as usual..wen clubbing...i was sober..very sober.i had a little fun..but still not as good if i was drunk!llol..left the club abt 2 coz one of our friends was drunk..when back to Dan's plc..put her to bed, Dan n KJ wen and buy food, while i showered n waited, yadi yada..long story short..slept tru like a baby, the next morning got ready for the great adventure..
On Sat, though we were behind time, everything went on smoothly, we organize ourself in the car, 3 cars, with 5 ppl each...i was with Ernerst, Xiang, Jason, and Joyie..the drive wasnt too bad..an hour in a half drive, well we could have got there in 45 mins, but coz of the rules for speeding, ( its Aus not KL)..lol..yeap..got there..settle down..got our rooms, the house is FARKING AMAZING!..HUGEEEEE!..overlooking the golf course..sigh..we went out to get some grocerries..came back..rested..start the boding session..the drinking session and all..dinner came..had BBQ...Dan, Chiok and a few of the boys cook, man the food was good! we had the best food throughout this trip..salutte!..anyways...then the night begin...the drinking game.."I never" game came on..that was fun..then the " Truth and Dare"...I aint gonna go into the details cause " Whatever happen in Torquay, stays in Torquay!"...lol..the amount of stunts and things happen!its just...i cant begin to describe..

Second day, we went to the beach. Mind you..it was around 10 degrees and with wind, we went to the beach!..how farkin crazy were we? well..VERY!..it was good..few of the boys went into the water regardless how cold it was..like what Jaysten said " its all in the mind"..so yeah..I was there too..not as wet as the boys..but at least I pulled up my courage and head in...it was good..there were alot fo surfers there..i really wonder how can they stand ythe cold!...it was honestly freeezzziiinnggg!!!!...

left after the second beach..rested..i took alot of naps..i ate..and sleep..woke up an hr later..and hung anrd..and sleep again..lol..usually the girls r the ones suppose to prepare the food..but noep..this trip..all boys!!thx boys!!..food was good..we had the "the last supper"..lol.l.it was funny..then we played Mafia..lol..i suck at that game..haha..then we play Devil cards..and some other silly card games...i got fooled alot fo time..not gonna mention wut..but I have a hubby now..really got married..haha..how cool is dat!..lol..my bouquet of flowers was actually a Chivas bottle..or was it Vodka? lol.l!!!...

the night ended pretty late....Here comes the day we were all hoping it wont come..the day we left Torquay..got up early..clean the house..dishes n all....got ready and left..took last picstures..bid our goodbyes..say thanks and left...bye house...bye Torquay..and back to reality...dammmitt!!...

Overall..i love the trip..it was..magnificant..i got new friends..GFS...i came out fresh and happy....memories..just..comfartable...we drank 14 botles of liqour..so we kinda had like a bottle each..lol..we smoke alot of packs of ciggs..i think my life is cut short of smoking and second hand smoking..lol..honestly..the upper deck of the house smelt ntg but ciggs!....lol...somehow the trip really didnt end for me..im still ont he holiday mood..lol...i came home on Monday..wipe out!..there were scenes playing in my head..and it made me smile..im really glad i wen for this trip..i out on weight due to the amount of junk i ate..honesly..im soo dead..

Tuesday i came down to the city....suppose to shop..but i got ntg...sighh..then suppose to catch movie..but didnt~wuuuttt!!!!.....dmn nonsense..then i stayed over at Dans plc again..there were 5 boys n me onli..wow...how great is dat..we were outside chatting..abt Torquay n all..i dunno..i love this kinds of hang out..soo awesome..slept abt 4 ish?..woke up today..had to the beach for picnic..and again..it was efffinnng coollllld!!!..we were bunch of crazy asians..we were the onli one on the beach...and yet..eating picnicing on the beach..what a fool!..

finally im back home...out of 5 days..i onli stayed one day in my bed..lol..friday clubbing!wohoo!..i m honestly crazyyy..i got work form 7 to 3 on fri..and 11am to 5 pm on sat..im gonna go crazyy..gonna sleep over again..helppp!!i dunno how am i gonna do it..but i dun care..gonna go all out...not gonna get drunk..but im gonna go all out..gonna haf fun..

anyways i haf pictures..but i'll upload a bit later..pretty lazyy..=.=!haha..

cya guys!!>..will update soon!...

loveeeee!!!

2009-04-23T22:03:00.000-07:00

AUTUMN LEAVES

Its been raining the whole day..drizzle mostly..so nice to stay in bed all day..but no i haf to get to work..it was the worst 5 hours man!!time pass soooo dmnnnn slooowwww..like snail slow..ehhh SS..lol..lammee=.=

Im scared for life man!..Well not life but for a while...I was soo hungry..and i was craving for Maccas..so after work i wen in and get some fries and fish o fillet...on the train and bum into Len...so we chat and then there was these couple that came in..i wont be cruel here..they were kinda.." enourmous"...figure it out...so Len whispered to me..he told me.." u eat more fried..u'll end up like them.."..i was like wtf..fark off..then the guy pulled out his lunch box..and there was Mccas fries in there...i look at Len and he laugh so loud..i turn to him to say..ure a farkin asshole!!..i kinda lost my appetite..my ppor fries and burger...blardy hell!now it is sitting rite infront of me..and i really dun wanna touch it...freakin fool!!>Len u watch out!!!asss!!!=(..

sides dat..im half way done packing..honestly i haf no idea what to pack...*shrugggg*..clubbing 2nite??HELL YEAH!!haha..

anyways..there shall be no updates till i get back!!

dont miss me!!!kissss!

2009-04-20T02:21:00.000-07:00

NOTHING BUT LET DOWNS

I have been holding two things throughout this 4 months here...and now..these two things let me down all in one day..and everything from then till now..i had nothing but lies..lies..and more lies...i hate to guess..more i hate playing guessing games...i hate to be left in the dark second guessing myself and not only that..one, i put my whole future in that file.but..sumhow.another its another lie..fake..another one..thought i could build a new one..but..turns up to be something rather dissapointing..u know the feeling when you can get somehing u wan..but yet u r stuborn enough to still go after..yes..for all my life..i strive to get wtv i wan ..wtv i like..from academics to life, to status and to boys..but hey..this is life right??life lets you down in any way possible, in any form and countless times..

right now..im putting down my feet..washing my hands..i had enough...i know enough..deal breaker..hell yeah!..

sides that...im kinda looking forward for this weekend..hehe..wanna know y??u shall know next week..all im hoping is that i haf craaazyyy weekend..whatever is gonna happen..will happen..im not gonna complain..take wtv its gonna come my way..and just make the best out of it!!..

my friend say i got a Build In GPS...hmmm...it doesnt imply i got good direction..but..this GPS only tracks down one figure

to you..." id come for you, no one but you, yes i'd come for you, but only if you told me to"

2009-04-17T21:28:00.000-07:00

PICTURES..ME..CAMWHORE....AGAIN..

2009-04-17T21:01:00.001-07:00

HANGOVER....AGAIN...

my head is spinning..im currently on my bed typing this blog..urghhh..my curtains are still blind up...im too lazy to do anything...last nite..was..awesome...in the way...i was farkin sober..tilll like..nearly the end of the night when Danny( the boss in Seven on Fridays) pull me to the bar and bought me lines of shots..or drinks..and i was gone!!totally goneee!urghhh..i hate this..this is the second time in a row i got wasted in Seven!farkin ridicolous..and i had church today and work..which i cancel coz of this hangover...oh noo!>.and i put a note to myself to get Asprin the next time..

woke up hungry..funny things is..everytime after clubbing..as in the next day..i wake up wanting to eat instant noodle and it has to be spicy ones..lucky i always have korean noodles in my food cabinet..wit this head like dat..i think i cant cook or go out and buy food.!urghh!

is there anything dat can make me not haf a hangover or better yet not drunk??
actually thinking of alcohol seriously makes me sickkkkk to my stomach...ohh nooooo..i think im going to go sleep again...mind u ..i haf not showered since i left last nite..ad its 230 here alrdy..how cleaaann!!..

i got pics!of me..showing off my dress..lol..

bye guys!haf a good weekend!

2009-04-13T18:52:00.000-07:00

3/4 BOILED AND 1/4 HALF BOILED...

Ahhh!!pincs and needles on my right feet now!!!painn!!arghhh!!!...hate the feeling!!nonon!!>.

anyways...woke up today..felt like having half boiled eggs..turn up..i really suck at it..the thing became 3/4 cooked and 1/4 watery...dmn disgusting..big FAIL for me!duhhh..

sides dat..im having my day off tmrw till fri!!wohoo!!thank god!!i ve been dreading these days for the pass week!!..sides dat..the hotel is pretty quiet due to the Easter break..so time passes really SLLLLOOOOOWWW at work..ive tried layin off the choc..have to try..=(..talkin abt choc..i really wanna haf MAX B now!!omg..cravingg...nooouuu..=/..

sighhhhh...sighhh..i would like to say more ..but i think i rather now...i shall spell my emotions out somewhere else..

soo i'll head off now..shower..get rdy..and off to hell..ta!